Alternative title: ุฑุฌุนููู ุนูู ุฏุงุฑู
โุฑุฌุนููู ุนูู ุฏุงุฑูโ
she demanded
โreturn me to my homeโ
she protested
she objected
as they carried her achingly
upon shuddering shoulders,
hefting and hefted: both against their will
no choice but to defy a vicious rhythm
thrust upon them by bloodthirsty villains
drunk on the illusion of power
***
and then the fever broke
or so it seemed
it was announced ahead of time
like dropping salvation into the sky
so it would be just out of reach
while the seconds until it arrived upon the earth
were counted in souls
in breaths
who bore witness to the news breaking
only to be barred from living the moment of release
only to be culled as well
as if the world demanded them as additional tax,
as if all that my people have been robbed of so far
has not been enough for justice,
for peace
if i didnโt know who was really in control
i would wonder if our blood was really that cheap
***
โุฑุฌุนููู ุนูู ุฏุงุฑูโ
โreturn me to my homeโ
she demanded
and when they returned
i wonder:
was she with them?
did she make it?
did she find her home?
and then they returned
we have never returned before
***
i donโt remember ever shedding the desire
to go home
i used to ache for the moment of return
to that neighborhood and those buildings
to those streets and those trees
to familiarity
to a childhood home
i used to wait
until i stopped
realizing no matter how many times i change the bandage,
this wound will never cease to bleed
i stopped waiting to go home
when i started understanding departure
when i had no choice but to befriend the unknown
i stopped waiting to go home โ
but it would be the biggest lie ever told
if i said i stopped wanting to
***
and then they returned
like tide at full moon
like air into choking lungs
like a child to her motherโs touch
covered in scars and still bleeding
bidding goodbye and still grieving
facing suffocation and still breathing
and yet upon it all, returning
daring us stop dreaming
daring us to start living
***
โand then the fever brokeโ
at least, thatโs what they said
if the fever has broken, and all is well
why then, is the patient still bleeding out in shackles?
behind bars, and not in bed?
